Many people do not believe that alcoholism and addiction are diseases but that a person who suffers from it is just a bad or weak person, a person with no “willpower”. I’ve heard so many people say “if they really wanted to stop, they would” or “you just need more willpower”.
Most alcoholics/addicts have probably heard “if you really loved me, you would stop”. If you’re not an alcoholic/addict, you can’t imagine how much it hurts to hear those words and so desperately want to stop yet unable to do so. Do you have any idea how many times I have promised with all sincerity, the very best intentions, and tried so hard to remain sober only to blow it within days or even hours?! Neither do I but if I had a nickel for each time…!!!
At one point I reached a point that if I heard “willpower” one more time I was going to deck someone! Well, maybe not literally although it was tempting! LOL The loved ones mean well but don’t understand it’s not a matter of willpower or even just not drinking.
It wasn’t until I entered rehab that I fully understood that my alcoholism was a disease and it was not my fault nor was I a weak or bad person. Yes, alcoholism and addiction are diseases acknowledged and defined by medical professionals. I dare anyone to say otherwise, those are fighting words! LOL
Many people believe because alcohol is legal it is not a drug. Do NOT be confused, alcohol is a drug! For me alcohol is the worst drug! Why? Because once I start drinking, I physically and mentally am unable to stop until I blackout and/or pass out. Alcohol has severe and negative consequences for me, a Dr. Jekyll/Ms. Hyde effect.
Shortly after I started attending Alcoholics Anonymous, a friend told me “one beer will get you drunk!” What the heck?! I remember thinking “That’s the craziest thing I ever heard, one beer won’t get me drunk!” Boy, he was right! I later told him he laughed and asked “Was I right?” Of course he was!
For an alcoholic, it begins with that first drink; it’s all downhill from there! Most of the time, I did not set out to get drunk just a good buzz. I can’t begin to count the times I planned on only having a few drinks. But, once I start it’s on!
There are numerous facets to this disease. Getting sober is the easy part, staying sober is the hard part a daily and lifelong battle! I won’t lie to you, not now that I’m sober, sobriety ain’t easy! Slips happen and I’ve had slips since rehab but I never gave up on myself nor lost my desire for a life of sobriety! I sought outpatient counseling and got myself back on track.
There will be days that will flat out suck! Hey, that’s life, sober or not, life happens! But I will tell you that even on the worst sober days life is a whole lot less complicated!
Remember, escaping with the bottle is only temporary. Life’s’ problems will still be there when you sober up. Those problems become more complicated with alcohol. For the alcoholic, alcohol of creates even more problems such as hangovers, no recollection of what you did the night before, how you ended up in a strange place, relationship, job, and/or legal problems, or worse…loss of life!!!
Truth is alcoholism/addiction is not just our problem. We are not the only ones suffering; it’s not all about us. Our loved ones hurt and suffer too, emotionally, mentally and often physically. Addiction is not a spectator sport, eventually the entire family gets to play.
Ok, I admit some of this may seem a bit discouraging and hard to take. Please do not be discouraged! I’m just telling ya the cold hard truth and sometimes the truth hurts. For an alcoholic/addict in active addiction we live in constant denial, the truth evades us. However, no matter how much these truths may hurt, they sure don’t hurt as much as the misery alcohol and other drugs bring to our lives and our families lives!
There is hope for a happier, healthier, and better life ahead for you and your loved ones! Sobriety can be achieved and believe me it is well worth it!!!
If you or someone you love is suffering from alcoholism and/or addiction, please seek help now! Asking for help is the hardest step to take but it gets easier from there! To help you get started I’ve listed some phone numbers and website links below.
Phone Numbers for Alcohol and Drug Addiction Help:
EMERGENCY 911
NCADD Hope Line 800-622-2255 (24 Hour Affiliate Referral)
Websites for Alcohol and Drug Addiction Help:
Alcoholics Anonymous www.aa.org – Help for the Alcoholic
Al-Anon www.al-anon.org – Help for the Loved Ones of the Alcoholic
Alateen www.al-anon.alateen.org – Help for Children Affected by Alcoholism
Narcotics Anonymous www.na.org – Help for the Addict
Nar-Anon www.nar-anon.org – Help for the Loved Ones of the Addict
National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, Inc.
www.ncadd.org/get-help
Like many people, at the start of the year, I made a resolution to decrease my alcohol intake.
ReplyDeleteDrink Less in Seven Days by Georgia Foster has really helped me stick to this resolution. Georgia is a clinical hypnotherapist and alongside the written version of the book, there are also 4 "Hypnosis Hub" recordings that readers are encouraged to access to help them with the program.
One of the great things about Drink Less in Seven Days is that Georgia (and I"m going to call her Georgia because she kind of feels like a friend) is totally non-judgemental about how much you drink, why you drink, why you feel you drink too much etc. I feel that this is an area where people carry a lot of shame and negative feelings and to have someone who approaches an emotional issue like this with absolute objectivity is helpful in driving the desired behaviours. She's on your side!
There are two main parts to Drink Less in Seven Days. The first is how your amygdala (the part of your brain that deals with emotions and fear/stress responses) can actually work against your efforts to quit or reduce your drinking. It shows you how to move your decision to drink away from this very instinctive part of your brain to your prefrontal cortex which is the part of your brain that is more concerned with considered decision-making.
I found this part of the book fascinating, particularly the parts where she spoke about silencing your inner critic.
However, it was the second part of the book, where Georgia broke down different personality types. what triggers them to drink and how to circumvent these triggers that I found most useful. (Also fascinating, if like me you love a good theory of behaviour and the ability to proclaim "Yes!!!! That's me!"). Because it makes total sense right? If you drink out of social anxiety (which is me a little bit) your methods to success will likely be different to someone who drinks because everyone around you is (also me a little bit).
The biggest take away for me was starting to understand what triggers my wanting to drink and learning alternative strategies should I decide not to. I think a really important thing about Drink Less in Seven Days is that it is NOT about quitting drinking altogether. It is about cutting down to a level that you are comfortable with, whatever that is for you. And this feels more manageable than quitting altogether.
The cru of this type of book though is does it work?
So here's the real deal. I started this program in January. It's now March and I can count the times I have drunk alcohol on one hand. During this time I have been to pubs, bars and restaurants, entertained at home and been entertained at other people's homes so it's not like I have been hiding myself away. I have been around alcohol and people drinking as much as I ever was.
Will I drink again? Almost definitely. For me, this experiment was never about giving up altogether. And I have far too much fun making cocktails for this to give it up completely! However, I feel that moving forward I will be able to drink in a more mindful considered way.
Thank you to Georgia Foster for a thoroughly fascinating book that does exactly what it says on the cover!
Here's a link to The 7 Days To Drink Less Online Alcohol Reduction Program.
John